Trying on a mother’s heels is a time-honored gay youth tradition. Whether the experiment results in a lifetime of drag queen ferocity or merely a moment of realization, for those gays who grow up to not have grown up, the highness heels provide will always be cherished. Not to boast, but as adults we have yet to find a pump (of the footwear variety) in our size. Instead, we were patiently waiting to have our knees done in Malaysia; that was until a simple new product allowed us to remove our names from the waiting lists (at least until the prices come down).
Lift Kits are helping us shorter gays give a beautifully manicured middle finger to nature. The inserts add up to 2” of height via a comfortable air-cushion insole that fits into most shoes.
Don’t get us wrong; there are aspects of being vertically-challenged that we enjoy, such as: less height reads better on camera (Tom Cruise, anyone?); a shorter stature often lessens the frequency of knee rug burns; and it’s easier to read price tags at the breakneck speeds required during Barneys Warehouse sales.
But there are those times when a girl just wants extra inches.
We’ve been tramping around WeHo and Silver Lake with the inserts for a week, and have noticed that the Lift Kits conquer two birds with two inches – not only do they give us a boost in height, they also enhance our confidence.
That was until our “friends” failed to point out that our jeans became floods thanks to our unfamiliar new height, letting us suffer through an entire week of snickers.
Those jealous, short bitches.
$20 – $35
